The Film that Almost Wasn't

Screened at TheFilm Arts Foundation
San Francisco, California
May 2005
04'17 minutes
w/sound



How does thought form in a person’s mind? Where does it come from? How does thought become reality? … And eventually how does a person transmit that thought to another human being in a process we call: communication? Why does an artist continue to make art in spite of the difficulties of standing naked in front of a crowd? “The Film that Almost Wasn’t,” is a short video poetry of the creative process, and an affirmation for the hope of genuine human connection through the medium of film.

Rene Descartes would argue that thought does not originate from nothingness, but from a divine source. On the other hand, Friedrich Nietszche pointed out there really is no way of defining what thought is, and therefore, it is impossible to deduce where they come from. Since the beginning of philosophy, human beings have pondered at the mystery of the origin of thoughts and ideas. As opposed to proposing a neat philosophical solution in five minutes or less, “The Film that Almost Wasn’t” rather celebrates this mystery. It is a personal piece on the beauty of imperfect human communication and the primal desire to bond with another.

As with any creative field, it is notable to appreciate the role of luck in the ideation process. While the ladybug was purely a happy coincidence in the form of a “documentary,” further research afterward discovered the ladybug was a symbol of luck in medieval Europe. Or perhaps there really is such a thing as a Filmmaker’s Faery … who brings out the sun just before the first take, or finds a better footage than one that was lost…and perhaps it came to me as a little red bug one lovely evening by the seashore of my day dreaming and left an imprint in my camera …